Facebook's New Face

"Facebook is like one of those people who keeps getting plastic surgery to 'look better' but gets the 'WTF just happened' reaction instead" ~ @Evil_Dumbledore

You think you hate the new Facebook update? It’s messy, and difficult to navigate, and not to mention – it’s driving you up the wall that all your Facebook friends hate it and are complaining loudly about it in YOUR feed?

Well, you’re wrong. You don’t hate it yet. But you might once you read this.

Let’s face(book) it – Facebook has been watching us for a long time. They know what you like – or what the target group they think you belong in like – just take a look at the ads in your sidebar. If you’re divorced they’ll advertize dating agencies. If you’re a woman, they’ll advertize menstrual aids or hairspray. And if you’re old they’ll advertize gravestones. Or something.

Despite this we’ve been led to believe for a while now that at least you have reasonable control over what you share on Facebook. Well, friends, that is what has *really* changed this time around.

Remember in the past, when you could post something on your friend Brad’s wall about your other friend, Jennifer, and then be fairly sure Jennifer would never find out,because she and Brad weren’t friends, and she thus did not have access to his wall? (A theory that nevertheless was not foolproof, because a) Jennifer and Brad could become friends, and then she could go back and read it; or b) Jennifer could have other friends (better friends than you) who were also friends with Brad, and thus told her; or c)some internet SNAFU or other could reveal your indiscretion.)

Still. Now you’ll have to be very very very careful with what you write about the Jennifers out there on the walls of the Brads. Because it now is “easier to control what you share”, meaning it’s a whole lot easier to share more than what you intended.

Say Brad is friends with Angelina, that neither Jennifer nor I know. Well. Whenever Brad comments on Angelina’s photos, her status, writes on her wall or does anything else related to her that isn’t any of my business, I am now being informed about it through the “ticker”. The ticker – the feed within the feed (go take a look in your top right corner if you haven’t already seen it) – reveals all your (and others’) secrets unless you’re being careful. The regular feed has in reality become obsolete – or at least nothing like we used to know it. It is now disorganized, split in “top stories” and recent (but without the old option of manually shifting between the two), and it is Facebook that determines what constitutes a top story (with some limited options of feedback from you, through categorizing people in various groups. I’ll get back to that in a bit). So, your old feed now shows only things Facebook thinks you’ll find interesting, while the new ticker shows this and everything else.

And by “everything else” I mean everything. Because if Angelina or Brad don’t take careful steps to control who they share whatever information they are posting to each other with, it’s wide open for anyone to read. For instance, Brad could post a comment on Angelina’s photo. That automatically gives me access to the photo and all the comments on it, unless Angelina has specifically restricted access to her photos to anyone but her friends. Brad, poor sod, has no say in the matter. (By the way, if you're worried, there's an excellent article about this that can be found here, explaining how you can restrict who sees what when.)

This isn’t new, though, it’s been there for a while. But, now this also applies to other things. If Angelina posts a status update, say, mentioning that she is hanging out with her new boyfriend, Brad, and her new boyfriend, Brad, answers with a ♥, then I can see this, and report back to, say, Jennifer. (Not that it is any of Angelina’s business,anyway, to write something like that unless she is prepared for the world to know, but whatever.)

Thus, in a way, Facebook has made it easier to stalk others.

However, it has also limited our stalking options. First of all, you can control a lot easier who sees what if you’re careful. Whenever you share something, whether it is a picture, a status update or a link, you can choose whether you want it to be public (note: public means public. Ergo even people who are not your friends can see it), for friends of friends (which is a silly option, really, since it’s basically the same as public), for your friends only, for certain friends (you can target some people specifically, or exclude others specifically), or maybe just yourself (but what’s the point in that?). It takes a little more awareness in the moment of posting, but it is easier to control that those pictures of you in the frat party don’t befall the eyes of your mother (why would anyone want their mother as their Facebook friend anyway?).

Secondly,by making the newsfeed all wonky, the restrictions on who you actually are realistically able to follow up on limits itself. If you’re a compulsive Facebook-user (like yours truly), this might be a problem, because you really do want to know what every single one of your 789 “friends” are up to at any given point. The ticker is useful in this respect, but since it’s so tiny and still a little meh to navigate, it’s not likely to be where you spend your days scrolling down to know the latest on every person you know.

The key to effective Facebook stalking post the 9/21-change, then, is to categorize your peeps. You may not like putting people into boxes, but Facebook wants you to.There’s a box for people you know well (close friends), a box for people you know not-so-well (acquaintances), and there are generated boxes automatically for people you went to school with or work with. You can freely choose to add or remove people from these boxes, but be aware of one thing: they might get notified. The last few days you may have gotten some strange requests to confirm that you indeed worked on the set of “Interview with a vampire” in 1994. It’s not Facebook getting smarter, suddenly being able to read your mind (or, maybe it is. It seems to steal brainwaves from its users, actually), but people you know who worked with you that put you into one of those boxes. And all of a sudden, Facebook knows your resume, even if you never shared it.

You can also make your own lists, but before you create your “hunks I stalk on Facebook”-list, be a little careful. Remember the previous paragraph, where people got notified of when they were being put in a list? Yeah… So far this doesn’t apply to custom lists. So far.

In the end, Facebook hasn’t changed. Yes, our privacy has been further compromised, but then again, the change is more that we are now aware of it being compromised. The trick is, as it always has been, to share on Facebook only what you are comfortable sharing with everyone in the world. In theory, every picture, every quote,every everything you post on Facebook, is public. If you don’t want everyone to know about it, it probably isn’t a great idea to post it in the first place.

Whiny Baby Hour

Eyeball source

So some people are happy about fall. They're all like, “oh, it's so much more comfortable,” and I want to stick forks in their eyeballs. I didn't get my fill of summer. I want to lay by a pool and have cocktails brought to me by cabana boys. I want to go for naked swims.

Never mind that I want to lose the weight I'm trying to lose first and it will probably be NEXT summer before I get close to THAT particular goal. I want both NOW: to be svelt and lying by a pool naked with cocktails. *nods *


And you know how some people can close their mouth and breathe at the same time? Like their noses aren't full of goo and their heads haven't been stuffed with fluff, and their lungs haven't been loaded with crap... I want to be like that. OH, what I wouldn't give for this blasted cold to just leave me this second.

Ack! But which one! (source)

But you know, this one was my own darned fault... Hubby got it... then daughter got it... then son got it... then they all got better and I said (say it with me) “I'm so glad I didn't get that cold.” you KNOW a phrase like that is the freaking kiss of death. The fates can't resist that taunting...


And our money troubles just seem to have taken over the world... So what I REALLY want, more than any of this other stuff, is a two million dollar book deal so I can just be DONE with that stupid 'pay attention to what stuff costs' part of my life. It's for the birds. I mean I don't intend to be wasteful. I will never be a person who... say... buys a boat just to own a boat... (a canoe maybe—I like canoeing)--and I might go on a cruise. But if I owned a freaking boat, it seems there's a lot of work involved, and I'm just not particularly interested in adding anything that complicates life... We might put a second story on the shoebox we live in—that would be good... give us a little room... get my writing out of the bloody basement (not that there's ever REAL blood in the basement, at least not very often)

What I really want is enough money so I don't have to work full time so that I can BOTH write, AND relax now and again.

Don't want to look like this (source)

Speaking of relaxing, there is something I'm doing now that's sort of cool... though, erm... not very relaxing *shifty* Two neighbors and I have been doing a Couch to 5K program and today is 4 weeks! (never mind we just started the week 2 workout yesterday...) but we've done it 3 days a week from the start and are now doing 6, but alternating the runs with power walks. So I guess I've got that going for me...

What else I've got is a DEADLINE Friday and two other things I intended to polish this month, so I really ought to get cracking. One is making progress, and my agent is currently in the process of moving to Idaho (how's that for irony... that's where I'm from) so she can't do anything with it for a week or so anyway.

A tart in a bath shouldn't cry... (source)

Did I mention I'd really like to be able to breathe? Oh! And eat what I want and still lose weight! I want THAT really bad. Where does one GET one of those?


This whiny baby session brought to you by autumn colds, too many potato chips and one sore butt.

So do you have anything you'd like to whine about?  Go ahead, get it off your chest...

Six Game Reviews

In a departure from my normal blog style of just screwing around, I thought I'd do something useful. So today I'm going to provide some game reviews for my fellow gamers.


Sid Meier's Civilization V
Players: One or more geeks

This is the latest installment of Sid Meier's highly successful turn-based, history-based strategy game.

There are more icons on the box than on the control screen.

Graphics: 4
Interface: 3
Gameplay: 1
Ease of setup: -7

Civ 5 removes much of the annoying thinking that cluttered previous versions. If a player does badly in any situation-- say, by failing to expand his empire-- there is a game mechanic which provides a reward. Diplomatic interactions with AI civilizations are no longer governed by visible numbers (that's just too much like a... like a game). Instead, you get to watch animated versions of rival leaders and try to interpret how the graphics team interpreted the design team's interpretation of real people. It's fun in the way that using Classified Ads to find a spouse would be fun if you were completely blind.

In another departure from previous versions, the time-consuming animations that accompany every single move and battle cannot be turned off. Because, dammit, they worked hard on those.

Installing the game is a simple matter of-- wait, first you have to install something called "Steam". Steam helps you by-- um, well, Steam has to run all the time while you're running Civ V, and you kinda need to be logged in with an intrusive online service to use it. But that's what society gets when it criminalizes people who use naughty vegetables or start a business while tolerating software piracy.

Cheat Codes: World Builder, I guess. Why bother?

Overall Rating: 2 If you want to play Civilization, get Civ 4 and download some of the fantastic user-created enhancements and scenarios (via civfanatics.com).




Hide and Seek
Players: Two or more of any age or species

One or more people hide(s). Another tries to find them.

Graphics: 5
Interface: 7
Gameplay: 8
Ease of setup: 7

In one variant, after the 'hidden' party is found, it is shot and killed. This is usually played with deer, who will only play as the "hide" player.

On that note, dogs only work as the "seek" player. Cats, on the other paw, enjoy playing both sides.

Cheat Codes: Versus a feline "hide" player, try: Num-num! Tuna! or simply run the can opener.
A doorknob will defeat most dogs, but is considered unsporting.
The scent of a horny doe can attract a hidden buck. You may consider this a last moment of anticipatory happiness for the buck in question, or the greatest disappointment imaginable, depending on how much your conscience troubles you.

Overall Rating: 8 With multi-species options and unlimited potential for innovative strategies, this one's a winner.



Co-ed Red Rover
Players: At least a dozen children ages 5-7

Form two teams (boys versus girls is good). Each team creates a line, joining hands, facing the opposing team.
After a quick huddle, "Red Rover" is asked to send over an opponent, who tries to break through any hand pair of his/her choice. If succesful, an opposing team member is captured (joins the other team); if not, the would-be breaker switches teams.

Graphics: 6
Interface: 10
Gameplay: 4
Ease of setup: 5

This game should not be played beyond a young age, as greater body mass and stronger grips can lead to injuries.

Unless you want to hurt someone, I guess. Or you're in college and you're drunk.

Cheat Codes: Pick two adjacent girls with whom you want to hold hands and deliberately (or unintentionally) fail to break through. But they first have to select you, so it helps if you're the smallest boy (which I was), in which case it's awesome.

"I feel suddenly weak..."

Overall Rating: 9 The game's single possible drawback is the incantation that summons the spirit/ghost/demon "Red Rover" to send over an opposing player. This subtle occult ritual can lead to later personality problems, cult membership, Satanic rituals, or (in 100% of studied cases) nothing at all.



Chicken
Players: One action hero and one villain

At a critical point in the story, the hero and villain charge one another head-on while driving cars or flying airplanes or steering boats or riding dragons or carrying 50% each of a critical mass of fissile material.
The first to veer off is the "chicken" and loses the game.

"I forfeit." ... "Me, too."

Graphics: 8
Interface: 5
Gameplay: 2
Ease of setup: 2

Inevitably, it is the villain who goes "chicken". This is absolutely contradictory to real life, of course, where nearly all villains-- from petty thugs to fascist dictators-- have high risk-tolerance and an unrealistic view of success probabilities.

The notable exception is the Knight Rider episode "K.I.T.T. vs. K.A.R.R.". The heroic AI-controlled high-tech vehicle known as "KITT" faced off against his evil counterpart, and KARR veered off first (despite going over a cliff and being destroyed) because of his self-preservation programming. Computers really do have faulty algorithms have faulty algorithms have faulty {image here] algorithms that produce str@nge

results.

Cheat Codes: An unimaginative script writer

Overall Rating: 6 Occasionally fun to watch, but not worth playing



Smear the Queer
Players: 3-1000 boys ages eight to twelve

Designate an object as "the ball" (a football is good, but literally anything will do). The person with the ball is "the queer" until tackled and forced to relinquish it. Next to grab it becomes "the queer".

Graphics: 3
Interface: 3
Gameplay: 6
Ease of setup: 9

It is possible that the game title includes an unfortunate homophobic slur. However, I do not think this is the case. For one thing, the game is old, and the term 'queer' (unusual, standing out) fits perfectly with its original meaning. Also, the person acting as the queer is "winning" (to the limited extent that such is possible) and likely to be considered brave and/or athletic, so an insult wouldn't fit.

Moreover, I remember quite clearly from my junior high days that the proper derogatory term was "fag". Outside of the game, you would never call someone "queer" unless you wanted to imply that he was homosexual and British.

Cheat Codes: None. This is possibly the most hack-proof game ever invented. Seriously, try it. Think you can play with a racquetball or a tennis ball and hide it under your shirt? With fifty sharp-eyed 10-year-old boys watching? Good. Effing. Luck.

Overall Rating: 7 The game has little room for inventive tactics. On the other hand, you can run around and have fun for hours without even trying to pick up the ball and get tackled.



Global Thermonuclear War
Players: One human, one AI, one nuclear arsenal (seriously, a real one), and possibly some Commies (seriously, some real ones)

The object of the game is to:
1. Initiate (or not) a nuclear attack
2. Keep the Commies from joining the game

"Oh my God, he thinks this is a date!"

Graphics: 7
Interface: 6
Gameplay: 8
Ease of setup: Too easy

A common complaint about computer games is that they aren't very social. This one is guaranteed to get you out of the house, provide interaction with interesting people, and possibly make friendships which last anywhere from a lifetime to about 12 hours (if you play poorly).

Cheat Codes: Running a simultaneous game of tic-tac-toe will abort the game and keep you from losing. Despite holding off the Commies, it is debatable as to whether or not this constitutes a winning move or is simply equivalent to choosing not to play.

Overall Rating: 7.5 It's better than lip-synching "Danke Schoen" in the middle of a weekday parade.

Cheers,
Jason

topical tuesday, terrific tales of tomorrow, today!

What does topical even mean? Did you ever wonder why the essence of something and being cruel share the same word. I mean to be mean to you today!
Topical means: 
1  a : of, relating to, or arranged by topics <set down in topicalform>

b : referring to the topics of the day or place : of local or temporary interest <a topical novel> <topical references>

2

: designed for or involving local application and action (as on the body) <a topical anesthetic> <a topical remedy>

Today, I've decided to go with the second meaning. I am going to discuss goo-like stuff we spread on our surfaces to remedy problems we may have. Three of these leap immediately to mind: 

Clearasil - I was a somewhat pimply kid. This stuff stunk. It left a muddy-orange-like deposit on your face, which, face it, was worse than pimples. My Dad, bless his tiny little head, thought I should put Noxema on my pimples. I liked Noxema - its fragrance was so refreshing and yet it smelled effective. Ha! Finally, my skin completely out of control, my mum took me to the doc's. He said - Never ever use Noxema on pimples! It makes them worse!!

The second unguent that springs to mind, is Calamine Lotion - oh dear, remember that? We went to the cottage every summer. It was heaven there - outdoor biffy, endless swimming, mosquitoes and poison ivy. One year, in particular, was baaaaad. My sister always got it worse than me. I remember her lying on the little cottage couch, her legs wrapped in calamine lotion infused rags, her eyes leaking tears. She couldn't walk, her legs were so infected. I like the smell of calamine lotion still, but I hated poison ivy. So, I got mad. Very mad. And I went out to where I knew the leaflets three thrived and I stomped around in them, in my bare feet. Yes, I did. I never got poison ivy again. True dat.


Third thing put on body in youth - Dettol - this was another of my Dad's remedies. He couldn't wait until we got a scrape or a bump, so he could take the stuff out and put it on us - protecting us from evil germs and causing us to scream in pain at the mere odour of the stuff. Our reckoning was that it must be a really bad hurt for him to go to so much trouble. We'd be hauled into the bathroom and sat up on the counter. He'd pour hot water in the sink and the yellow Dettol - it would immediately make the water milky. What was in that stuff?


I miss my Dad. I wish he could put some dettol on my heart so I wouldn't miss him so painfully. But he can't. So...

Reading Monday- Something Old, Something New

I haven't read many books lately.  Honestly, with teaching, taking care of my family and home, there doesn't seem to be a spare moment to indulge in my favorite pastime.  However, this summer I did get to read one classic, reread a favorite sci-fi of mine and am currently enjoying the first in a series of four mysteries.  Did you think from the title of this post, that I would focus on novels based around marriage and romance?  Well, you're partly correct.  :D  So here we go . . .

The play The Crucible by Arthur Miller is a book that several of my colleagues have taught to the eleventh grade, simultaneously and in alignment with the beginning of United States History, and was highly recommended to read over the summer.  It is a tale of the Salem Witch Trials during the late 1600's.  It begins with the "possession' of a teenage girl who dabbled in the dark arts.  The story tailspins into a bevy of treachery, adultery and manipulation. Abigail Williams, the adolescent who implicates several of the townspeople as witches, is scorned by John Proctor, a farmer and husband to Elizabeth Proctor.  Abby exploits the court's fear of witchcraft to achieve her means of Elizabeth's destruction.  It is John who questions the court's decisions, Abby's motives and the disintegration of a cohesive community due to hysteria.  John refuses to implicate individuals in town, which consequently would only sully his name and reputation.  Miller equates this witch hunt to the 1950's McCarthy Era in United States history.  Miller was empathetic to John Proctor's cause as he, himself, was accused of believing in Communism.  Miller refused to be coerced by the government and as a result The Crucible was born. Unfortunately, both time periods were disparaging moments when fear ruled society.

The  second book I read was Kindred by Octavia Butler.  This is a sci-fi novel written during the late 1970's but is still very relevant today.  The protagonist, Dana Franklin, is a young African American woman who involuntarily travels back in time to the antebellum South.  Dana is drawn to the slave era by Rufus, Weylin, a young, white boy who is consequently the son of the master who owned her ancestors.  She saves Rufus from numerous dangerous situations and experiences the trials of slavery to ensure that her familial line survives this precarious moment in history.  I highly recommend this book if you are into mystery, time travel and human relationships.  I've read this book over three times and each time I find something new.

Finally, I am currently indulging in On What Grounds: Coffeehouse Mysteries No. 1 by Cleo Coyle.  I bought this book at the beginning of July and somehow just never got around to reading it.  The book grabbed me from the very first page.  Her language is so descriptive and the words just seem to meld together like a really delicious caramel macchiato. Now, I have lived in New York for over thirty-four years, damn didn't mean to tell my age, and the locations of various landmarks is very accurate.  I am only a quarter of way through the novel and find myself fully immersed in this tale of intrigue.  Clare Cosi, a manager at the Village Blend Coffee, who moves from New Jersey to a nice little apartment in downtown Manhattan.  On her first morning back to work, she discovers the unconscious body of one of her coworkers.  With the cafe trashed and her colleague rushed to the hospital, Clare's questions are unanswered and her attention diverted to the sexy police officer.  The game is afoot!  By the way, my fifteen year-old daughter has read this novel and asked me to purchase the other books in the series.  It's a great read so far.

What books are you currently reading?  Inquiring minds want to know!  :D

1.  Image taken from Wikimedia Commons.
2.  Image taken from Amazon.com.
3.  Image taken from Wikipedia.
4.  Image taken from Amazon.com.

TGIF

So I have about half an hour to cobble something together for today's post before I have to get ready for work. Yup, as usual, I have procrastinated until almost the very last moment before opening up Blogger. *shifty* You may notice that we have a new label today - 'Friday Free For All' - which is brilliant because this means I can ramble about anything. *shifty once more*

We are back to our regular five-a-week schedule at last! This is excellent news for me because, while the summer break was probably a very good idea for all involved, the lack of posting obligations has made my writing efforts of the last couple of months virtually non-existent. *shifty for the third time in a row* 

Anywho...

There are several things I could ramble about today. I could remind everyone of the two WriMo challenges which are on the horizon. Next month's NaBloWriMo, and the infamous NaNoWriMo in November. But I'm pretty sure that there are going to be infinite blogs spouting WriMo info at you during the course of the next few weeks.

I could put together a few paragraphs about my relief at resuming a fairly normal work schedule, not least the fact that I have returned to the relative freedom of only working 16 hours a week again. *sighs blissfully*

I'm pretty sure that wouldn't interest the majority of you, though.

I could, perhaps, venture on the subject of the imminent Facebook changes, which made 'big' news yesterday. I could wax lyrical about the inevitable complaints that will spring up in people's status updates over the next few weeks (until everyone gets used to the changes and completely forgets about how the 'old' Facebook looked like anyway).

Again, I foresee a good amount of blog posts covering this topic in the very near future, so I don't think my efforts will be required.

Maybe I could witter on about the fact that I don't know what I should blog about (as usual), and so I am just typing and typing and hoping a post will come together at the end of it.

Shoot. That's what I always do. *is four times shifty*

Anyway, here I am, it is Friday, and I have stuck to form and rambled about nothing in particular (which strangely fits in quite well with our old 'Who Am I Friday?' label). And so Burrowers, Books & Balderdash presents its first 'Friday Free For All' post for your (dis)pleasure. It's not much, but really, what do you expect to get when something is free? *is surely not going to say 'five times shifty' here*

*coughs*

Anyway... it really is nice to get back to our five-a-week schedule again, and I'm honestly looking forward to composing some tidy posts (apart from this one, obviously) in the future.

Have a great weekend, everyone, and see you all next week!


Image borrowed from here.

*is on a sugar high*

Ooh, it's been a while since I've had to do one of these... these totally off-the-wall ones that stump me until I get going, and then something suitably bizarre ends up spilling onto the screen and it's all good until the next time. I couldn't come up with anything, though, so I figured I'd grab a snack and do something else for a while. Then I realized that my snack could in fact be an actual topic. What snack, you ask?

CANDY CORN

I am a complete mad fiend for the stuff, ohhh yes indeed. Sweet tooth? I've got a whole mouthful. I will happily chow down on this sugar-filled, nutritionless treat for hours at a time (or until I run out, whichever comes first) - I infamously consumed two whole pounds of the stuff at my best friend's 15th birthday party without getting sick (though I'm not sure I could pull off that party trick anymore). I've become a bit more discerning over the years - I avoid brands which contain gelatin, for example, 'cause I'm all vegetarian and stuff - and I've developed a predilection for the pumpkins, too.

Ah, but that's the traditional kind. There now exists (wait for it) - GOURMET candy corn! Oh yes... you can get caramel apple flavour, or perhaps maple, and they're different colours and everything. We will not discuss the waxy and tasteless abomination which is the so-called "bunny corn", however - that pastel horror that appears in the spring. *shudder* Yuck. There are certain treats that should really stay attached to their traditional holidays - Reeses' Peanut Butter Eggs are plenty awesome enough for that time of year, we do not need bunny corn (or Peanut Butter Pumpkins/Xmas Trees/Hearts/name-your-holiday-symbol).

Or maybe we do. I can't deny that I love them. But no. Cadbury Creme Eggs are only available in the spring and I adore them and they would just not be as enjoyable if I could go get them any time I wanted. So everything else can just stay put too. Yeah.

Wow. I'm seriously on the biggest sugar high I've had in a really really long time. We're talking bug-eyed twitchy jitters here. Maybe I should lay off the candy corn for a while.

Hah! You didn't believe I actually would, did you? *munch* Now THAT would be delusional!

Image borrowed from here.