09 February 2011

Spreading the Love


So for Valentine's Day we (the Burrow) thought a week of features related to love might be a nice touch... and guess who got assigned the WRITING day...

I've got a confession. I am a MAJOR cynic. I don't happen to believe two become one, or that another person completes ANYBODY (certainly not ME!)... so addressing this... LOVE thang was something I just wasn't quite up to.

Don't get me wrong. I have something akin to love in all my books... people fall for each other... it is part of life. But for ME, it is always a side story (and typically it is either within an already existing relationship, or catches people busy with OTHER stuff as a sweet surprise...)

But you know... this is for VALENTINE'S DAY, so what is a Tart to do? I can't disappoint you!

So I scratched my head and said, “SAY... I know a romance writer!” (in actuality, I know several, but being me, I thought I wanted a SPICY romance writer). In fact this romance writer has just been contracted for her first novella! (which I've read and it is FABULOUS, even if it DOES center around a love story... in fact... THAT is part of the trick... Stacy Gail is sassy and feisty and mixes a little snark, a little heat, and a lot of torture... THAT is my kind of romance!)  So I asked Stacy to write a guest post on Romance for all of YOU.






Margaret Mitchell Had It Right

When Tami asked me to do a guest blog on how to write a romance novel, I was really stumped. All I could think was, “Well, you have a sexy dreamboat and a woman everyone can relate to, throw in some animal magnetism, sparkling repartee, a steamy grope scene or two, and boom – there ya go.” Easy, right?

Oh, if only it were that simple.

To get to the heart of what makes a romance really WORK, you have to dig for what makes a love story unforgettable. For me, despite the fact that I’m the world’s biggest sucker for a tale where love triumphs over all, the best work in romantic fiction is one of my all-time favorites –“Gone With The Wind.”

But I have to admit, it’s a bit of a love/hate relationship.

Margaret Mitchell had every ingredient known to the romance genre in “Wind.” A beautiful heroine? Check. A roguish bad boy? Boy howdy, CHECK. Unrequited love, as well as a love triangle and all the internal conflict this brings? Check. External conflict (a.k.a. the Civil War)? Definitely check.
Yet, despite all these pure-win elements, there’s a tiny part of me that hates old Margaret for the story she told. Why? It boils down to one thing. I didn’t get my HEA – my happily-ever-after. According to the guidelines of all the publishing houses currently cranking out commercial romances, the HEA is mandatory. If you don’t have one, it gets chucked right back at you like a boomerang.

So… was Margaret Mitchell wrong?

Thirty million sold copies say no.

There’s a reason why “Wind” is considered to be one of the best romances ever written, despite the fact that it doesn’t follow the current romance genre’s formula of delivering the HEA. Margaret Mitchell was a master at ripping into the darkest, most painful core of emotions and gushing it out on paper for everyone to experience. She showcased the emotion known as Love in all its myriad facets – pure, selfless, selfish, all-consuming, lustful, indomitable. Just thinking about the agony of writing something like that still makes me shake my head. The woman must have been in tears the entire time she was writing her masterpiece.

Which leads me back to Tami’s question on how to write a romance novel. I’m sure it’s different for every romance writer, but for me it’s all about getting to the heart of the story, and for a romance that heart is LOVE. When I hurt for my MCs or find myself instinctively shying away from the emotional time-bomb that’s about to explode all over them, I know I’m on the right track. To have two people who are willing to put themselves through the agonies of internal and external conflicts just to be together is a beautiful, even noble, thing. In the end, it’s not about the uber-hotness of the guy, or the lush backdrop of their surroundings; it’s about two people struggling to find where they truly belong.
But, if you’re like Scarlett and Rhett and that belonging just isn’t found, I’ve come to discover that this is okay, too. The struggle to find the person who is your other half will continue, and another story is just waiting to be told. After all, tomorrow is another day.




Tart's Post-partum

So it isn't a car accident with a lot of groping? [sorry... inside joke there]

Oh MAN... I LOVE Gone with the Wind! And it IS a romance, isn't it!? I think you've got what normally bugs me! I don't buy into Happily Ever After (maybe because I know after the wedding it is just work work work *shifty*) Stace—thank you so much for so much better a job than I could have made of this!!!


Image of Stacy Gail (the Margarita-skating penguin) drawn by Marissa Montano
Movie poster image from Publicfotki.com

08 February 2011

#$%^&(*&^% SNOW!!!

Okay, so remember back in early December when I was grumping about how we hadn't had any snow yet? Errrrrm. Yeah. We are now in the too-much-of-a-good-thing category. Holy hexagons, it just DOESN'T STOP. Now, I went to college in Rochester, NY - two degrees' worth, so 6 years. I'm thoroughly familiar with blizzards, lake-effect snow, 8-foot-high snow drifts, and all that fun stuff (not being sarcastic, generally speaking it WAS fun, especially when we sneaked {oh, sorry Tami - snuck} trays out of the dining center and went sledding on them). But the thing is, on the whole, Rochester is far better equipped to deal with massive quantities of the white stuff than good ol' Boston.

Of course, that's part of the problem - OLD Boston. With narrow winding streets and mazes of one-ways, there are roads that the plows just can't fit down, especially when snowbanks from previous storms have narrowed them even further (and there are cars parked on both sides...). Oh, and then there's the fact that we've been getting walloped every 4 or 5 days since the end of December. There's just no place to put the stuff, especially when it doesn't want to melt. Then again, even when it does melt, the grates are iced over...

Speaking of ice, that's been building up in gutters and on roofs, leading to a record number of building collapses and structural failures throughout the region (like this one). As if snow days weren't disruptive enough to schools, how about being closed for days or even weeks because the snow caved in your roof? And there are some sidewalks you do NOT want to walk on, since the possibility of being impaled by a falling icicle is higher than anyone is comfortable with. Check out this set of frozen stalactites, snapped by my roommate as they grew on our house:


They got even bigger before finally launching groundward in Sunday's thaw - I must admit, it was rather amusing to be awakened by the thunderous crashes of icicles into the yard. Surprisingly loud, divebombing icicles...

I'm tired of digging out parking spaces, too. There's a longstanding tradition in Boston that for 48 hours after the lifting of a snow emergency, the rule is "you shovel it, you own it", and you'll find everything from folding chairs and traffic cones to garden gnomes and piles of buckets sitting in cleared spots. The annoying thing in my neighborhood is that we're one block in from a main road that people need to vacate during a snow emergency... and so they come in and park on my street (which means I usually end up parking two blocks away...) and then they don't bother to shovel out their spots properly afterward, just gun it out of there and leave the slushy icy mess to refreeze, meaning no one else can park there without doing some major icebreaking (or just getting stuck, as the case may be... go on, ask me how I know that...).

Now, lest anyone get the wrong idea - I do still love snow. What I don't love is trying to drive in it alongside idiots who don't know how; having to go to work at a silly retail job in highly dangerous conditions (remind me to tell you about my duct-taped windshield wipers sometime); and how it looks after it's been rained on and plowed up and peed on (lotta dogs 'round here). But as I type this on Monday night, guess what's in the forecast for tomorrow? Only about an inch this time, supposedly - enough to make it pretty again, I hope, without any of the problems we've seen lately. I'll let you know.

07 February 2011

Reading Monday: Haruki Murakami

In my native Norway, the only Japanese author most people are likely to know the name of is Haruki Murakami. Then again, Murakami is quite famous. Last summer, the distinguished author visited Norway for five weeks, culminating in a festival in his honour at the “Litteraturhuset” (House of Literature) in Oslo. The festival had a lot of visitors and Murakami was treated as a literary superstar in Norway. His own comment – “This is the coolest summer I have ever had in my life” – indicates that he appreciated the event, though one might speculate whether the wordsmith didn’t also hint at Norway’s climate; rather chilly if you’re used to Tokyo’s suffocating summers.

Since he has made such a name for himself in not only Norway, but throughout the world, it only was appropriate for me – Japan-lover as I’ve become over the years – to read the work of Japan’s most famous contemporary author. I haven’t yet covered everything he’s written (and I’m not sure I ever will – there are certain of his books I prefer over others, and some that don’t seem to fall into my sphere of interest at all) – in fact there is a brand new (though old) book of his at my night stand as we speak (or, as I type…) – I have read the books considered his most significant. Since it is Reading Monday I intend to share my experience of them with you.


Norwegian Wood

This was Murakami’s big break, and for obvious reasons also the book that made Norwegian readers interested. Even though the book has nothing to do with Norway, it flatters a country when it’s mentioned in a popular book title. So much, in fact, that Norway had a considerable effort in the recent promotion of the adapted version. I haven’t yet seen Norwegian Wood the movie, but I’m looking forward to it!

But the book, back to the book. I loved the story, loved the characters, but at one point was so convinced I knew where the story was going that I was disappointed when I was wrong. The danger of being fond of plotting, I guess...

Anyway – aside from the small plot disappointment, I really liked Norwegian Wood. Of the Murakami-books I’ve read, it’s the most “normal” one, in the sense that very few fantastical elements happens (I will get back to this). The story is one of nostalgia, sexual awakening and identity, and it underscores how people’s actions affect close ones, or not-so-close ones. Also, as the main story takes places in Tokyo, it offers an interesting addition to an (at least to me) otherwise chiefly Western rendition of student life in the 1960s.

A small warning, though. You will find the Beatles song stuck in your head, so you might as well just start listen to it right away… 





Kafka on the Shore

This is probably one of the most complex books I’ve ever read. It’s got two main plots – both of whom are quite challenging to follow. Yet, it can be read as a simple story about searching, for someone or something. The two main characters (Satoru and Kafka – not the author, but named after him) both leave their homes for very different reasons, their stories entwined in several ways, but they don’t actually fuse together. The characters are endearing, confusing, interesting, challenging, but never boring. The descriptions of music, of moods, of the places visited, make you feel that you’re listening, sensing, seeing, in that particular way only Murakami can. 

What often throws me off in Murakami’s books is his flirtation with magical realism. It’s something I don’t particularly care for. Often I find myself wondering why he includes this, and I usually end up feeling that there is something written between the lines that I am not capable of grasping. In Kafka on the Shore it is mostly Satoru’s story (visited by such celebrities as Johnny Walker and Colonel Sanders) that made me feel this way, and several times I found myself wishing that I could only read the other half of the book. But then these two stories are part of a larger whole, without which the book would not have been the same. Plus I was deeply fascinated by Satoru’s ability to talk to cats (a reference to The Wind-Up Bird Chronicles, by the way).

In the end, the mysticism is what makes the book, and I found myself trying to make my own explanations to the many enigmas. Definitely a book that makes you think!


The Wind-Up Bird Chronicles

Of the Murakami-books I’ve read, this is my definite favourite. And yet I can’t actually explain why. I read it four years ago, when I last lived in Japan, and I seem to remember that it was anything but an easy read. I think I spent almost three months reading it (I know, actually, since I had to keep renewing my library loan). I never put it down because it was boring, but it had so many elements to process that it took a while for me to absorb them all. Trying to recall them all for this review I fail – completely – and trying to do a little online research in an attempt to remember the actual plot, I fail again.

So far I probably haven’t convinced you…

What I do remember, is how well crafted this book was. As a writer, I found it truly joyous to read. Each description – even the seemingly boring ones – were beautifully made. I remember most distinctly reading a passage about a woman getting dressed, described in such detail that any other author would have had to cut it from the book because it was completely irrelevant and dull. But not Murakami – not only did it not feel irrelevant (it felt like character description), it also did not feel dull. How he does it I cannot say, but it certainly was beautifully done.

In addition, I remember that the back story – one of the many subplot stories weaved into the main plot, captured me. As a historian I was fascinated with the fact that Murakami dared to address Japan’s controversial history. As a human being I was touched by the relationships described in such tender detail. As a philosopher (if I may…) I was intrigued by the fact that this book made me want to climb down a well and spend some time down there.


Common for all of Murakami’s (fiction) books is that they heavily reference popular culture, they (more or less) include elements of magical realism, and often they are both humoristic and confusing (which isn’t mutually excluding features, I guess…). Since I don’t speak Japanese I have always been forced to read Murakami’s books in translation, but I find that at least the English translation reads surprisingly smoothly  (I’m not as fond of the Norwegian translations, though). 


If you’re wondering what book to pick up next, I can definitely recommend a Murakami! 

04 February 2011

I can see for miles and miles

A remarkable story of discovery

How far can you see? The question is not so straightforward. Anyone can glance up at the night sky and see starlight that originated thousands of light years away, but our brains' default software truncates everything to the average horizon of some twenty miles. Consider that monkeys, birds, and insects can see those same stars-- do you think they are capable of seeing thousands of light years? If not, what is the alternative?

I contend that the origin of sensory input is not the decisive factor. When I look at the full moon, I see only reflected sunlight; am I therefore looking at the sun, some 93 million miles away, or am I seeing the moon, some 485000 miles away? Better yet, take a gander at this and tell me how far away you're seeing:


That's a NASA artist's rendition of an exoplanet, ergo, I think you'd agree that you're seeing something about two feet away (your monitor). Now imagine that this is a physical drawing and you're seeing it on someone's desk via NASA's live webcam-- what's your distance measure now? You might say that it's still a mere two feet, because the light that strikes your eyes came from your monitor. That's a boring answer, and not very consistent with common usage. Reference the previous paragraph about the sun and the moon. Look at your keyboard and tell me if you're looking at your keyboard (like I told you to do), or if you're looking at a distorted and darkened image of your light bulb (whence the photons originated).

In fact, every bit of light that reaches your eyes has been distorted, translated, and generally fuzzed up. And it achieves this without the benefit of technology. Photons get doppler-shifted, they interact with our atmosphere, and they do funky stuff that's remniscent of a hypothetical elastic collision between equal-mass billiard balls.


And when that happens, you can't tell whether one photon generated another identical photon or simply passed on unimpeded, and, if I understand my quantum mechanics, it is actually incorrect to say that there is a difference. What you see really depends on the information, however transmitted, and therefore depends on your knowledge.

Irritated yet? Okay, I'll get on with the story.


When I was a wee lad of about ten (and I was pretty wee, so I probably looked more like a lad of seven), I had learned enough to know that the stars and stuff were really, really far away. But I also knew there was no way I could see for trillions of miles. Sure enough, when I looked up at the night sky, I perceived twinkling lights some tens of miles away. And that was it. I wondered how those scientists did it. Many of you may still wonder. I figured it had something to do with telescopes, or maybe spaceships. Surely, when those guys flew to the moon, they had a better view of things and the distances were much more obvious.

Right?

So I asked for a telescope for Christmas. My parents obliged with the best that a non-millionaire could afford, which gave me something slightly better than ordinary binoculars. When I looked up at the stars and planets I was rather disappointed to learn that everything looked almost exactly the same.* I did have some fun looking at the moon, and distant landscapes, but I figured the telescope simply wasn't big enough. So I shifted my dreams to plan B, which involved becoming an astronaut and/or building my own spaceship.

Soon after that, I noticed girls, and couldn't think about anything else for a very long time.

My journey of discovery resumed in college, when I took a course in astronomy. But here's the remarkable thing: I was scarcely aware of it at the time, because I was following the same journey that had begun thousands of years ago with curious-minded folk the world over. What's more, it had nothing to do with spaceships, and far less to do with telescopes than I ever expected.

One such journeyman was Nicolaus Copernicus. He watched the stars go round and round in predictable fashion, as did the sun and moon, while a few oddballs among the group liked to stop and go backwards every now and then. Nick didn't like that one bit.

The mystics, we should note, were more than happy to attribute these oddities to supernatural intervention; just as mystics today are content to describe odd noises as ghosts and strange lights as alien visitors. Persistent anthropomorphisation of unknown phenomena is the hallmark of bad imagination.

Anyway, Nick was rigid and imaginative, and insisted that something else must be going on. Thus he came up with the heliocentric model, with Earth and the planets going in circles around the sun at various distances. Not only was this model simpler, but it paved the way for the first calulations of interplanetary distances. Shockingly, until then, mankind had absolutely no clue as to how far away the sun was. But why would they? You look at it (or near it, don't burn your eyes) and have a guess. But by knowing that Venus was between the sun and the Earth, and knowing they both moved in (roughly) circular orbits, a transit of Venus could now be used to measure the distance to the sun.

Thus armed with knowledge, we can now look at the sun (again, make it a cursory glance) and see something that's 93 million miles away. That's over 4 million times further than our most primitive ancestors could see. Wow. Let's stop and give a toast to dear Copernicus, and to Jeremiah Horrocks, who made the first good measurement in 1639. Well done!

But of course, we're not done. How 'bout them stars? They're reeeeeaaalllllly far away. But now that we know the distance to the sun, we can use a trick called parallax:

If that diagram confuses you, step outside and look at your neighbor's chimney against the distant horizon. Now walk sideways. See how the chimney moves relative to the hills? The closer your neighbor's house, the "faster" the apparent motion of the chimney. Likewise, but observing nearby stars at six-month intervals (when the Earth has moved "sideways" twice its distance to the sun), we can compare their position relative to more distant background stars. Friedrich Wilhelm Bessel first did this in 1838, measuring the distance to 61 Cygni at around three and half parsecs, or some 67 trillion miles. Earth-based parallax measurements are effective for stars up to about 100 parsecs away, or 1900 trillion miles. Now we can see 20 million times further than Jeremiah Horrocks. And the best is yet to come.

With a catalog of several thousand stars at measurable distances, astronomers can do all kinds of tricks with spectral analysis (looking at the color of starlight) and measures of luminosity (how bright the stars are). One good trick is to make a chart:

The height (y-axis to my fellow geeks) shows how much light each star puts out. They can figure that out by comparing the apparent magnitude (how bright it looks from here) and the known distance (taken from parallax). The bottom of the chart shows the spectral class, and further spectral analysis can take a star's temperature, which pretty well narrows down what type of star you're looking at.

See the trick that's coming? Armed with this information, you can look at a star of unknown distance, determine what type of star it is, and therefore how much light it puts out. By comparing that absolute magnitude to the apparent magnitude, you can calculate the distance. You probably feel drunk with power by now, so we'll do just one more step.

At much greater distances, outside our own galaxy, it's difficult (if not impossible) to observe individual stars. Unless they blow up, which can happen in one of several ways.

Regrettably, stars eventually die. When that happens, if they're more than three times the mass of our own sun, they can collapse into a neutron star or even a black hole. If they're less massive than our sun, they aren't dead yet (because they universe is only 14 billion years old, silly). Stars in between those sizes become white dwarfs, and after blowing off excess mass in their death throes they are all remarkably similar.

Now, many stars in our universe are part of a binary system. Ergo, many white dwarfs are paired with neighboring stars. As you probably guessed, then, the smaller white dwarf that isn't putting out any stellar wind is likely to accumulate matter if its companion is sufficiently nearby:


If the white dwarf accumulates enough mass, it triggers carbon fusion and explodes again. And the really cool part here is that "enough mass" is the same wherever you go. Any such white dwarf that blows up is going to do so with the same mass, no matter how long it takes to build up to it, and thus they produce nearly identical explosions. These are called a Type Ia Supernova. So: We've already measured the distance to a lot of stars within our own galaxy and nearby companions; and we've seen a few of them go up as Type Ia Supernovae, producing an exceptionally distinct light curve (spectral analysis again) and having the same "brightness" (absolute magnitude) every single time. Once again, we observe a more distant object (Type Ia Supernova in another galaxy) and compare that absolute magnitude with the apparent magnitude to determine the distance. We might need a telescope, but at this point we can see objects as far away as 1000 Megaparsecs; which is about 19 million trillion miles; which is ten million times further than we could see using parallax; which is roughly 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 (a sextillion, if you like) as far as can be seen with the naked brain.

Of course, all of that is a mere outline of some of the major techniques. Like all good science, astrometrics involves plenty of corroborating evidence. But at the least, I hope this shot of Supernova 2006dd in the galaxy NGC 1316, some 70 million light years away, looks like more than a haze of pixels to you now.


I can see for miles and miles and miles and miles and miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiles....


Cheers,
Jason


* If you know someone with a low-powered telescope and astronomical curiosity, I recommend looking at Jupiter. Even with a pair of binoculars, it can be seen as a small disc surround by pinpoints of light which are the Galilean moons.

03 February 2011

The many loves of Jupiter

Growing up in India, I was not really exposed to Greek and Roman mythology- when you have two indigenous epics (one of which is the longest epic in the world), and a pantheon of gods and goddesses each of whom seems to have nothing better to do than to get embroiled in stuff that should not really concern them, you do not really need to look further afield for stories of adultery, deceit and valour.


But being the geek that I was, long before I reached my teens, I could recite the names of all the moons of all the planets making up the solar system. I even made up stories about many of them- the lone satellite of Pluto was named after the wife (Carol) and daughter (Sharon) of the person who discovered the satellite - most people I told the story to even believed me, and it took the Hercule Poirot story starring Cerebrus to get me to stop quoting it. The moons of Jupiter were particular favourites- Io, Europa, Ganymede, Callisto, and my own particular favourite, Amalthea. Even the names were sheer music!


And then in the days between middle and high school, I discovered Roman mythology. Suddenly, Jupiter was no longer just the largest planet, he was the temperamental and powerful King of Gods. When he was not reducing things to ashes with one look of his eyes, he was seducing every young and not so young creature around. They didn't even all have to be female. To my bemusement, one of his lovers seemed to be a young lad, Ganymede. And if Jupiter was busy sowing his seeds, his wife was equally busy unleashing vengance on anyone who dared allow her husband to get near them.

But what was most appealing was that I did not have to learn any new names to know these stories. The noblewoman, the priestess, the hunting companion - all of them turned out to be moons of Jupiter. And Amalthea, my own beautiful Amalthea. Why she was the goat who nursed Jupiter when he was abandoned in a cave.

Suddenly, through my obsession with the solar system, the world of Roman mythology opened up in front of me.

Why Jupiter? Why today?

Because Jupiter looks over Thursday. And I do think he would have approved of Delusional Thursdays!

And because of his numerous conquests, he would like the announcement that we are about to make.

The Burrow is proud to present the third version of its Valentine Feature. A drabble (or more) a day, everyday in the month of February, with a special bonus on Valentine Day. All your favourite bloggers (except one- Leanne, where are you in the month of your birth?) are contributing. But what makes this feature specially meaningful for us is that we have contributions from five of our wonderful followers.

We are not telling you who they are - know only there are five of them!
And do not be fooled by the giant heart- there are Burrowers are involved, and the one thing you can expect from them is the unexpected.
 
What are you waiting for? Rush across to the-burrow.org, and enjoy. And be sure to bookmark the page, because you don't want to be typing out the entire address everyday!
 
 
Image credit -
Moons of Jupiter - http://www.kidscosmos.org/kid-stuff/graphics/jupiter-moons-1.jpg
Jupiter - http://schools-wikipedia.org/images/153/15327.jpg.htm

02 February 2011

Tarred With The Same Brush





You know, I'm not really good with the more serious topics for this blog (in other words, most of the topics *shifty*), but as I was busy painting my son's bedroom earlier today, it occurred to me that writing is quite a bit like decorating.


No, seriously, it is.

I mean, most walls need at least two coats of paint, just like your novel will need at least two drafts, right? You also have to keep going over the same part several times, just to make sure you have even coverage. It goes without saying that each paragraph of your masterpiece is gone over time and time again, tweaking this bit and that until it's 'just so'.

Then it's the dreaded 'cutting in'. You know, those awkward bits, like the corners and the skirting boards. Using the smallest brush you have to make sure you don't get paint on the bits to be glossed, and gloss on the bits to be painted. Of course, there's no 'cutting in' with a manuscript, but there's always the 'cutting out' to drive you insane. The x amount of words that need to be cut to make the length more manageable; the dialogue that needs trimming because you realize that your characters shouldn't really be ramblers just because you are.

When the walls are dry (or your first draft is written *shifty*), you then have to look closely for the places that need patching up. Those missed spots that you didn't notice the first time. Pesky missing letters because you didn't hit the key hard enough on your laptop, for instance. Or blank places where you needed a name but couldn't think of one, so left a few asterisks instead.

Once all your walls are dry, the patches filled, the cutting ins (and outs) completed, all you have left is the glossing. I hate glossing. Loathe and detest it. It's hard work, stinky, fiddly, and time consuming.

Yup, glossing is to painting as editing is to writing.

It sucks totally, but has to be done to finish the project properly. No prizes for guessing who did the glossing in my son's bedroom today (not me!). Now, if only I could get the hubby to edit my novel as well as he glossed the skirting boards, I'd be a happy bunny.


Image courtesy of publicdomainimagesdotnet.

01 February 2011

The Tar Sands on Topical Tuesday


How can I write something topical when I don’t listen to the news? Really I don’t. I know my friends don’t believe me but it is true. It started a few years back – I think I was reading a book by some guru or another – yes, that one that Oprah loves – Talliard Nimbob? You know who I mean. Anyway he said I should take a media vacation. Or perhaps it was that doctor who I like – his name escapes me right now – yes, come to think of it – it was him. He said….er….I should take a media break.  Perhaps they both said it along with telling me that I should buy fresh flowers every day and clean fatty things out of my cupboards and buy local and walk and meditate and have a bitch and stitch group and get things off my chest and rinse my sinuses with salt water and dream big and god’s in the details and oh…but I digress. The thing that got to be a habit is NOT listening to the news, NOT reading newspapers much (Saturday Globe & Mail sneaks in), NOT watching David Suzuki’s The Science of Things on television because it makes my blood boil etc… Did you know that my Dad watches the House of Parliaments Question Period – live – every day that they sit? That isn’t good for you. Believe me.

So all this ignoring the news and getting audio books from the library so that my driving time is also a reading time instead of a raising my blood pressure time – has led me to not know much about current affairs. Shocking I know. I used to be a news junkie – now I’m like one of those people who give up drinking and start some other ‘healthy’ habit with the same boring fervour. Now I am obnoxious about not being in the know.

This last week though I was knitting and I was out of Christmas DVDs to watch so I watched David Suzuki. For those of you on the planet who don’t know who this is – you can Google him – he is an environmental scientist who has become the Deepak Chopra of raising the alarm. This week it was about the Alberta Tar Sands.
All Photos Credit: Garth Lenz

A documentary entitled The Tipping Point - Canada’s national disgrace – the reason we won the worst award you can win at the Copenhagen Environmental meeting in 2009. This from a reporter for Mongabay - Jeremy Hance mongabay.com December 21, 2009

Canada was the biggest obstructer at the Climate Change conference in Copenhagen, according to the Climate Action Network (CAN) an organization made-up of 450 NGOs. On Friday CAN awarded Canada the 'Colossal Fossil Award' for doing the most to obstruct an ambitious climate change agreement and for doing the least to mitigate climate change.

"Canada’s performance here in Copenhagen builds on two years of delay, obstruction and total inaction. This government thinks there’s a choice between environment and economy, and for them, tar sands beats climate every time. Canada’s emissions are headed nowhere but up," said Ben Wikler of Avaaz, announcing the tongue-in-cheek award for
Canada.

In an energy-intensive process,
Canada's tar sands industry extracts oil from a mixture of sand, clay, water and bitumen (a heavy thick oil). Two tons of earth and three barrels of water are required to make a single barrel of oil. The process also requires two-to-three times as much energy as refining crude oil. The tar sands are said to be the single largest industrial source of greenhouse gas emissions in the world.

In addition according to
Wikler, Canada made no movement on providing financial aid for developing nations to move toward green technology and for vulnerable nations to mitigate the harm done by climate change byway of droughts, rising sea levels, desertification, extreme storms, and flooding.

The Tipping Point-discussed all of this and finally gave us the news (which probably everyone but me knew) that there had been an independent study proving the scientists, who had been summarily dismissed up until now, with being right and declaring this a major environmental disaster. Of course, it isn’t Canadians who are seeing all the benefit of us keeping our heads in the tar sands – no, the oil recovered at great cost to our land, to our aboriginal people, is flowing to the good old US of A. It’s the money that no one can resist. They just can’t and they won’t until it is gone gone gone.

It was a terrifying show – a special – on for two hours... You understand it was my knitting obsession which trumped my not watching news obsession  I am knitting my step-dot fingerless gloves. I’ll do anything to get love from her. Anything. But now I have to think about what a mess our dear old world is in.