“What do you do?”
“Where do you live?”
“Which college did you go to?”
“How old are your kids?”
When I meet someone for the first time, it is always one of
these questions that pops out of their mouth after “Hello”. It is almost as if
the answer to these questions will give them a measure of who I am and whether
they should bother investing time in getting to know me.
And I rarely answer honestly. Most of the time, I am
delightfully vague, giving just enough to border on the truth, definitely not
enough to slot me. Occasionally, I tell a deliberate untruth, because it is
easier to brush people off that way. Regardless of my response, I hate it.
Who you are has nothing to do with what you do for a living,
or which car you drive, or the names you can drop. Who you are is not a sum of your
educational qualifications, your professional experience and your relationship
status.
Who you are is the person you are. Your interests, your
passions, your philosophy, your values. It is something that can be gauged in a
moment, and something that can simultaneously take a lifetime to learn.
If someone cares to look beyond, it is not too hard to get a
measure of who I am. If they cannot, I don’t particularly want to waste time
letting then get to know me “better” (as if they ever knew me at all).
Anyone who wants to know me, can find out Who I Am without
much difficulty. And I really couldn’t be bothered about the rest.
And since I cannot really publish a post without any pictures, here is a self-portrait
that is very imaginatively called, "Portrait of me with a green bottle".
6 comments:
There is a time the question 'what do you do?' will have an answer that gets at your very core. It is when you are brave enough to answer 'I write.'
Try it.
Natasha- I always think the same thing.
I also hate the question "How are you?" because I know that the person just meeting me doesn't really want to know. So I answer with an untruth- "Fine. Just fine." In reality, no one is just fine but that is the acceptable brief response to this question.
Excellent post and as always perfectly matching image.
@ Hart- but that would be a big fat lie, won't it? I haven't written anything of value for years :-(
But maybe I can try, "I read, I run, I crochet, I try to write, I drink numerous cups of tea", and see the reaction I get :-)
@ Chary- I absolutely hate those. Nobody cares, but everybody asks. And I give them the same answer, and even have a fake smile that goes with it.
Thanks.
Now see, I frequently answer the dreaded "How are you?" with "exhausted", "cranky", or some other bit of truth. It's amazing how taken aback people are when you don't say "fine". It's kinda fun. ;-)
@ ViolaNut- I'm going to try that next time. Watch out for the follow up blog post!
Very true. I hate it when people do that. Getting to know someone takes time and there are things which only our closest friends will ever know.
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