"Hi, I'm Batman, and this is my brother, Robin."
"No way, I'm Batman. You can be Robin."
"No, I am Batman."
"You were Batman yesterday. Today it is my turn to be Batman."
"I'm older than you, I am Batman."
"If you don't let me be Batman, I will cry loudly."
"Don't. Then Mamma will come, and she'll find out what we are doing."
"Okay, okay. You be Batman. Cry baby."
"I'm not a bully."
"And I am Batman, and you are Robin."
"I don't want to be Robin. Idea. You be Phineas and I will be Ferb."
"We'll try it again, okay." *clears throat. "Hi, I'm Ferb and this is my brother Phineas."
"I am seven years old, and my brother is four years old."
"No, I am five years old."
"No you are not. You are four years old."
"I am almost five years old."
"But now you are only four years old. Baby."
"But next month I will be five years old."
"So what? Now you are only four."
"Last month, you were six years old, but you told everyone you were seven years old. So I am five years old."
"That was last month. Now I am seven years old, and you are four years old."
"Bully. I am almost five years old."
"Okay, okay. Don't fight, you don't want Mamma to come do you?"
"How do you know?"
"Because she unlocked Disney XP so we could watch Power Rangers. She lets us watch Power Rangers only when she has "office call"."
"Yes. Yes. Yes."
"I wonder why she is always doing "office call"."
"Because she is in a new office. This office is an 'merica, so she has to talk to them in the night."
"She is in a new office?"
"Not the old office."
"I liked the old office. Everyone played with me, and told me I was cute."
"And the uncles all played football with me in the office, and the aunties gave me chocolates."
"Yes, it was fun."
"But this office is nice too. We get to watch Power Rangers. And use Mamma's computer."
"But you don't let me use the computer."
"That is because you are too small. First you learn to read, then you can use the computer."
"I am a baby. I can't read."
"You are going to be in grade 1 next year. You have to learn to read."
"But I don't like reading."
"Don't you want to lie down on the bed with Mamma and me and read your own book?"
"No. It is more fun if you or Mamma reads to me."
"But Mamma has said she is not going to read any more. She says you have to start reading yourself."
"If Mamma doesn't read, then you read for me."
"Why should I?"
"Because you are my big brother. And brothers always help each other."
"What does Mamma know. She doesn't have any brothers or sisters."
"But she says brothers should always love each other. So you have to read to me."
"Okay. Okay. Now what do you want to say to Mamma's friends about Mamma?"
"She looks like Minnie Mouse."
"Yes, she does."
"But she doesn't even wear a bow like Minnie Mouse."
"But she dances like Minnie Mouse. Not a proper dance."
"Mamma will not like if you tell her friends she looks like Minnie Mouse."
"I know she will not. And if you tell her, she will tell you that you look like Mickey Mouse and take your picture."
"Why is Mamma always taking pictures?"
"I don't know. She likes it."
"I like it when she takes my picture."
"But you always make faces."
"I like making faces. I practice my faces, then make faces when she is taking pictures. You should do it also."
"Okay. And what else do we tell people about Mamma."
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING WITH MY COMPUTER. I TOLD YOU NOT TO TOUCH MY COMPUTER. TWO MINUTES I GO AWAY, AND.........."
Phineas and Ferb